I’ve done a couple of Daily Grains on the themes of guilt and shame and also forgiveness so today I want to do one on something that is at the root of both these things and it is absolution.
So for good or ill absolution cannot come from an external source – true absolution comes from you. Where you resolve whatever it is you feel guilty or ashamed about or whatever it is you feel you need forgiveness for, you resolve it within yourself, so you absolve yourself.
I think the idea of receiving external absolution merely gives us permission to absolve ourselves. But the feeling of relief, the feeling of absolution really is generated by you. By you coming to terms with it, by you feeling at peace with it, by you giving yourself peace about whatever that situation was.
So this is a very useful thing to know.
A lot of times we go through life feeling regret or feeling ashamed or feeling guilty and waiting on something else or someone else to tell us it’s okay, let it go.
So realize that when we are okay with it and when we let it go when someone else says it, it is merely us believing we have permission to do so and so we do so. But the act of doing so stems from you.
If you can understand this really clearly it can be a very powerful source in your life.
One you can now forgive yourself and absolve yourself of things that you are carrying around of hurts, regrets, behaviors that you wish you hadn’t done. Let it go – it’s done.
And two, you will hopefully be more careful in the future to not do the things that you need absolution for.